Gibberish

It’s 7 am, and I’m still awake.

This could be due to the excessive alcohol or it could be because I just don’t wanna sleep till my house maid gets in. Let’s face it if I fall asleep now, there is no way I’m opening the door for her. This would mean an apartment left unclean. The thought leaves me quaking in my shoes.

So anyway, I’m up at 7 am and I’m doing some heavy thinking. This is generally what happens when I’ve spent a night consuming excessive amounts of alcohol.

Sure, there are a bunch of smaller irrelevant thoughts running through my head like “Is God real?”, “Is there a meaning to life?”, “Am I happy with where my life is headed?” and “What was George Lucas thinking when he came up with Star Wars Episode: 1, 2 and 3!”.

The most important thought however is my sister. Now before you go thinking this is going to be some emotional rant about how I love her and how awesome she is. You’re wrong. It’s not.

Instead this rant is about one of the most important rules in the “Bro Code”. Simply put, a guy does not try to hook up with his best friends sister, and…

How I do not agree with this rule.

I for one am all for my best friend hooking up with my sister. In fact, I encourage it. I mean after all, if you can’t trust your best friend who can you trust? In fact I’ve gone as far as to tell my best friend, the legendary MWA to add my sister on Facebook and to start conversing with her. You see, the benefits of this are numerous!

You start with the fact that I know MWA would have only the best of intentions with my sister. He wouldn’t try to do anything that I would disapprove off. Then there is always the fact that I know MWA would take care of her and would make an awesome brother in law. In fact, imagine being the Best man at my best friends and sister’s wedding? Does it get better than that? And honestly, if he doesn’t take good enough of care of her, he’ll have me to answer too. Finally, it’s time I paid back MWA for trying to hook me up with his sister. He failed… but he did try and I still owe him for that.

Now, I’m not trying to pimp my baby sister out, I’m just trying to look out for her and I think this would be the best way to do it. Does she have a choice in the matter? Sure, but in her mind only.

After all let’s face it, what I say goes. If it doesn’t, then I make it happen using devious tricks and traps. Trish, consider yourself warned.

By the way I do realise how inane this is, but you can’t blame a guy from trying to protect his younger sister from all the perverts like me out there.

Couple of side notes:

I’ve come up with another theory, if you’re best friend starts dating a girl, it’s your responsibility to hate that person. No matter how much you like them, you have to learn to hate them. After all when your best friend breaks up, he’s coming to you for solace and what kind of friend would you be if you couldn’t take his side without hesitation. While he’ll hate the fact that you have nothing good to say about his girlfriend. He’ll be indebted to you for the same reason’s once he actually breaks off the relationship.

This by the way works for both men and women.

In fact I’d go as far as to say, I’ve learnt from my mistakes with a certain big nosed female lawyer and her boyfriend. I should’ve been a better friend to the female lawyer but chose to support her boyfriend. Let’s just say that didn’t work out too well.

So remember, always despise your best friends new boyfriend / girlfriend. This way, you’re never in a compromising situation.

Finally and this is a question one of my reader’s has had for a while, why do men wear open toe sandals?

Essentially, these are meant for women and not men. Let’s face it, women have some of the most comfortable clothing out there on the market. Barring the high heels, tight tops and short skirts.

When you look at the fact that they get to walk around in open toe sandals, loose and comfortable skirts and of course the fact that they have a device that not only grants their vital feature(s) support but also helps to enhance it!?! Well, it makes you believe that they are doing something right.

This resulting conclusion? Barring certain untouchable pieces of clothing such as the device which enhances and supports, us Manyly Men may want to try and imitate women’s fashion. Come on, the Scot’s caught on early and came up with the kilt. The male equivalent of the skirt. See what it’s done for them.

Now that we’re finally coming up with progressive idea’s such as the open toed sandals for men, hair clips and let’s not forget the man purse (after all, we all also have a grocery list of things to carry!). We’re finally approaching an age where men are finally allowed to look “Manly” and be comfortable at the same time.

T’is a new age indeed.